I was thinking about how I might get to be a guest on Jimmy Kimmel.

I have clients who must picture that all the time. Because let’s face it, as professional thespians, they are always one, or two, or three (OK, in some cases maybe four) small steps away from getting a regular role in a TV series that could easily lead to a seat on Jimmy’s couch.

Me? I would have to heroically save a nun and her baby and a cat from the top floor of a burning building to get on Kimmel. And how likely is that? I mean what’s a nun doing with a baby and a cat, anyway? And I’m gonna need a ladder, which I don’t exactly carry around in my car, which means I gotta traipse over to… wherever one buys a ladder… the ladder store, I guess… negotiate the purchase of said article… drive back to the burning building… figure out how to open a ladder… it’s… a lot.

By this time the nun and the baby and the cat would all be dead in heaven – this, working on the assumption that cats are even allowed in heaven, which I highly, highly doubt.

I suppose the other way I could get on Jimmy Kimmel, of course, is by becoming the oldest person to ever win the main event of The World Series of Poker.

And yes, I am just one, or two, or three (OK, maybe four) small steps away from that.

Step one. Fly down to Vegas and enter into a few minor events at this year’s World Series.

Step Two. Win enough to parlay that into an entry in the $10,000 main event.

Step Three. Win that.

Step Four. Have my people call Jimmy’s people.

Easy-peasy.

OK, so Step One. Check!

Plane ticket is bought, hotel is booked, leaving tomorrow morning (Saturday).

We’ll see how step two, three, and four play out.

Just FYI – to acquire the pic of the nun, I had to google he words “nun burning in building” so I’m sure the FBI will be visiting any time now.