I’m on a plane. To Las Vegas. Jackie Mason is on the plane and the Rapper “50 Cent”. They’re sitting together and playing some weird game that involves playing cards and thumb-wrestling. I can’t stop watching them, trying to figure out what the rules are to this game.

I get up to go to the washroom and in front of me in line is Bailey from WKRP in Cincinnati. She looks great. I mean she looks time-machine great. I say ”Hi” ever the conversationalist. She looks at me and she says “Life Can Be Short” just like that. I go “yeah?” She says “maybe we should have sex” and I say “Here? On the plane” – even though I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in having sex with this freakishly well-maintained hot 1970’s TV star, or anybody else for that matter, other than my beautiful wife, Ruth, who I love profoundly – but I need to see where this is going, so I say “here? on the plane?” And she leans over to look out the window as if she didn’t actually realize until that very second that we were actually even on a plane, and she says “Well you look like a winner, anyway.” And she goes in the washroom and closes the door. Slam!

And I wake up. Weird dream.

And I’m on a plane. To Vegas. And my first thought is “What did she mean by “anyway”?

I don’t think I’ll tell Ruth about this dream. She’s right beside me.

We’re heading to Vegas to celebrate… what? New leases on life. Our kids enjoyment of summer camp. Our pre-anniversary party. (18 years in September. 18 fucking years in September. 18 of the most glorious fucking years in September.

So we’re here at The Beautiful Wynn Hotel.

The WSOP is on but I will not be partaking. You don’t do that to your wife. You don’t bring her down to Vegas and join a potential 3 day tournament and say to her “Baby, I’ll either see you in 10 minutes or in 3 days. That’s just not right. That’s not how you treat the little lady. Not if you want to stay married 18 fucking years, you don’t! I can tell you that for free.
So I’ll play in a little one-day event $200 rebuy on Saturday. Guaranteed $25000 prize pool. Nothing to sneeze at. Speaking of which I think I’m coming down with something. I better get some sleep.